Sunday, December 22, 2013

New 10 Commandments

My New 10 Commandments For Myself

The Ten Commandments
1. Be your true authentic self.
2. Make time for those you love.
3. Treat others people as you’d like them to treat you.
4. If it hurts you, let it go.
5. Change your thoughts - and that will help change your feelings
6. Don’t put it off till another day. If it is important, then do it today.
7. Enjoy the journey – it’s not just about goals.
8. You only have one life – so make it meaningful for you.
9. Be kind to others.
10. Always find a reason to laugh and smile.

In consideration of how I'd like to start off the new year, I will post this on my refrigerator and hope to live up to it as my goal.  

2013 was a pretty decent year, all things considered.  My son and I, we were poor, but had enough.  We were housed and not homeless.  We were successful with weekly counseling and support services.  We had fun, despite having very limited resources.  We still have our cat, though her tumor is growing bigger monthly.  We were able to reconnect with old friends through social media, which previously I was reluctant to use.  We enjoyed spending time with friends and family.  Ian and I read dozens of books, some of them together, when I read to him nightly.  I started my blogs which give me a platform to share my thoughts and dreams and memories, and which allows me to contribute positive energy out into the world, which is of great importance to me.  We both took some risks that paid off emotionally.  I like all three of my jobs very much, and gain a lot of satisfaction from the work - from the kids, their families, my coworkers and supervisors - I enjoy them all.  In small ways, I get to make a difference.  Yeah, all in all, a good year.  Nothing spectacular, nothing mind blowing, but... good.  And "good" is good.  :)  For a change, I'm looking forward to 2014.  Bring it!

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Just Keep Moving - Johnny Depp

This is a lovely philosophy.  Most of us, however, worry far too much about what others think.  I know I do. However, the older I get, the better I manage to follow my heart and not be dependent upon what others think.  Since dear Johnny is less than a decade older than me, I have time to get there.  A test of my resiliency will happen in the new  year, when I post my personal ad online, looking to get back into the dating arena.  It’s already screwing with my head, worrying about what potential suitors might think.  Unfortunately for me, it takes a while for people to see beyond the shields I erect and I know that sometimes come across as aloof and disinterested.  In truth, I am just considering what words to use to convey the stampede of thoughts running through my mind at any one time.   Maybe caring less about what other people think about me and striving to continue to be true to myself will be one of my New Year’s Resolutions (though I should resolve never to make them, in truth). 

Happy holidays to all of you, whatever you celebrate!  And happy winter solstice today!

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Deep Space Nine - Rejoined

In this episode Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Dax meets Lenara Kahn, the new host of the wife of Dax's former host Torias, and they are not allowed to renew their relationship.  This episode was DS9's way of pointing out that love is love, regardless of gender.  In 1995, this was news. When we shot this episode; it was a closed set and very hush-hush. Kudos to Terry for being one of the people to start breaking down our own societal taboos!  I was in the closet in 1995, and this episode encouraged me to come out within a year and a half of leaving DS9.  Thank goodness things have changed for the better in the last nearly 20 years. 

I also admit I had a crush on Terry because 1) she's a brunette with blue eyes and that's my thing, and 2) she had an extensive vocabulary of profanity and knew how to use it!  Last I heard of Terry, she showed up at the big Las Vegas Star Trek convention in full costume to help recapture the Guinness World Record for most Trek costumes in one location - and the fans loved it.  So, a shout out to Terry Farrell, who has retired from film & television production - I'm not even sure where she lives these days, either Pennsylvania or New York.  Wherever you are, Terry, I wish you joy!  You rock.

Here's what writer Ron Moore had to say about the episode.

“To the audience, you’re playing out this metaphor of a taboo that you’re not supposed to be involved with somebody, and the audience sees these two women who are in love together, but the show will never ever comment on it, because it’s really about this Trill taboo, this completely other issue. But the idea of homosexual love is staring the audience in the face no matter what they do, but we never have to mention it in the show. It just became this lovely tale about these two forbidden lovers that just couldn’t get over that one had died and didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, and here they come together in these two other bodies, but what they once felt for one another is still there, but the societal taboo was so strong that one of them had to back out, one of them wasn’t willing to take it all the way. It was just a lovely bit of Star Trek because it really was an allegory for our society, and that’s ultimately what Trek does best.”

— Ronald D. Moore, Writer & Producer, on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine S4E05: "Rejoined" (via inamirrordorkly at Tumblr)

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Duplicate Blog on Tumblr

I have decided to do a duplicate "Star Trek Into Relevance" blog over at Tumblr.

I initially chose blogger/blogspot because I like how the websites look, it's a beautiful thing with many great options. I really do like the platform here at blogspot better than at Tumblr, but I'm frustrated with it also.  It will no longer allow me to post pictures, which makes for a rather boring blog, frankly.  EVERY single time I try to post one, it freezes up and I have to start over.  I've tried emailing blogger repeatedly and have gotten no response.  So, I will do both for a while and see how it goes.

In addition, I have so many ADS that I cannot get rid of here, that I cannot see what I'm writing most of the time.  I am hoping I don't forget to use the spell check button before I post, because I KNOW there are typos!

Over at Tumblr, I can add any photo I want, bookend a post with photos and it's FASTER.  You can visit the monthy archive and see everything I've blogged for that month.  Plus, after two days I have two dozen followers, which means more people are reading my stuff. ...which is one of the two reasons I blog - for others and for myself.  While blogger/blogspot LOOKS so much better and more professional, if it won't let me POST what I want then it's pretty useless to me!

You can find me at

Sunday, December 8, 2013

Jimmy Doohan & the Engineer

I had the pleasure of meeting Jimmy Doohan several times – a few times at conventions back in the day when I attended such things plus once for breakfast with a couple other people involved with Star Trek TOS.  He was a nice man, and I wish I had used my time more wisely in our meetings and had more memories.  I also had an acquaintance who used to housesit for Jimmy and Wende and my other memory of the Doohans is of going to water house plants and take care of the house – and they had one of those upside-down boot racks that stretched out your spine while it held you securely upside down, and we took turns using it at his house.  Not all my memories of Star Trek are inspiring or meaningful.  This one is a weird memory.   J  

This story, however, is fairly fabulous.  As Jimmy tells the story:

"I got a fan letter from a young lady. It was a suicide note.
So I called her, and I said, "Hey, this is Jimmy Doohan. Scotty, from Star Trek." I said,"I’m doing a convention in Indianapolis. I wanna see you there."
I saw her — boy, I’m telling you, I couldn’t believe what I saw. It was definitely suicide.Somebody had to help her, somehow. And obviously she wasn’t going to the right people.

I said to her, "I’m doing a convention two weeks from now in St. Louis." And two weeks from then, in somewhere else, you know? She also came to New York - she was able to afford to got to these places. That went on for two or three years, maybe eighteen times. And all I did was talk positive things to her.
And then all of the sudden — nothing. I didn’t hear anything. I had no idea what had happened to her because I never really saved her address.
Eight years later, I get a letter saying, "I do want to thank you so much for what you did for me, because I just got my Master’s degree in electronic engineering.”
That’s…to me, the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.”

Well done, Mr. Doohan, well done.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Sir Ian McKellen - Actor, Activist and Awesome

One of my favorite all-time actors is Sir Ian McKellen.  I love him as Magneto (X-Men), as Gandalf (LOTR/The Hobbit), as Leigh Tebing (the DiVinci Code) and pretty much anything else I've ever seen him in.  I really wish I had money to head to New York City and see him in the plays he is doing right now (with Sir Patrick Stewart, another of my favorite men), Waiting for Godot and No Man's Land.  Maybe he will do something in Los Angeles again and I can get down for it.  Right.  If wishes were horses, we would all ride like kings.

I guess I will have to be content with  having spoken to him once.

I worked on the season of the previous “ellen” show (with Ellen DeGeneres) during the year that she (and her character) “came out”, in 1998.  It was a wonderful time  and a great experience.  One of my jobs as the Set Production Assistant was to babysit the stage phone, and at lunch one day, I received a call from a gentleman who identified himself as Ian McKellen. It was not an altogether uncommon occurrence to receive phone calls from “close personal friends of Ellen” on the set from overzealous fans… but, there was that British accent that gave me pause.  I found Ellen smoking out on the patio and told her who was on the phone.  Her response surprised me.  She leaped to her feet and said, “Oh my god, really?  Do you know who that IS?”  I replied no.  She rolled her eyes, grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and dragged me behind her to the set phone and ordered me to stand there quietly.  She hastily picked up the phone.  I could, of course, only hear Ellen’s end of the conversation, but I was surprised to listen to her say “yes, sir” and “thank you, sir” and “of course, sir”.  Who on EARTH was Ellen yes-sir-ing?

She hung up the phone and her happy, silly grin turned to a frown as she turned to me.  “Kerry, you are the worst lesbian EVER*, “she said.  “Go find out who Ian McKellen is, please.”   

I did.  I named my son Ian after him.

Thank you, Sir Ian, for all who you are and have done!  If I had a hat worth tipping, I would tip it for you.   Check out Sir Ian’s website, it has all kinds of interesting information!

(*I identified as lesbian back then for lack of a better label; now I identify as pansexual.  I guess Ellen was right after all – I *was* a rotten lesbian because of the men, but I obviously was not straight because of the women, LOL… ah, well.  Glad I got that “ figured out finally, better late than never.  And yes, one of my claims to fame is that the QBIC - Queen Bitch In Charge - called me the worse lesbian ever, LOL, gotta love that).

((P.S. I am having problems inserting photographs onto my blog for some reason, so while I figure this out with much cussing and hair pulling, we won't have pretty pictures to look at.  Bummer, I know.))